If you’re anything like me, which again, do your now-self and future-self a favour and try to run away from that possibility as hard as you can, you probably forgot both that Easter was coming, and what Easter was actually all about. For years and years, it meant a family-get-together, lots of food that was lavishly and labouringly made yet not eaten, and chocolate. Everywhere you look, there’s chocolate. Everything you are offered has chocolate. Especially here in Belgium.
But thanks to the lock-down and worldwide pandemic, all that (chocolate) has not been realised, and Easter had lost its meaning altogether for me. Until, during a break with a coffee and, you guessed it, some chocolate, I scrolled through Instagram and found multiple posts on Easter and the moon phase of the moment. Ironically (or is it?), they both screamed the same thing:
Now, I will say it again just for the sake of the statement being clear: I’m not religious, if anything I am more spiritually inclined, and while amusing most of the time and fascinating at best, I am also not a believer of horoscopes and planetary influences upon our moods, actions, and/or personalities. That being stated clearly and loudly, I must add the following: whaaaaaat is going on?
Cause listen, I don’t know how you all feel exactly, and it may have just been the sun shining like the beautiful, energetic source-of-life-on-earth that it is, but since the weekend, I’ve been feeling the spirit (of rejuvenation, renewing, refreshing, etc, not the Holy Spirit. I do not claim that; after one minute in my head it would probably turn around and bolt as fast as it could anyways).
And while Henry Cavill’s newest Instagram update certainly helped manifest the idea of going along with this time of rebirth in my head, this new app that’s been enthusing some USAmerican friends of mine called The Pattern hit me with the same message (and I’m sure we all would get the same one, so you needn’t bother check it out if you read the next sentence): Coming from a confusing, chaotic place in your life (and moon phase), you’re now cycling into a phase of renewal (with a new moon phase being entered into), and find yourself having the energy to discover new things about yourself, as well as polishing older parts of your self.
Having read that a week ago, when life seemed mucky, and sad, and just not for me to fully grasp hold of at the moment, I dismissed it with a smile, not unlike a seasoned mother who hasn’t had her daily half-bottle of wine yet and her child’s telling her it’ll become president some day. Sure honey, dream big.
But on a long walk around the city of Leuven yesterday (Easter-physical activity eh), this idea turned over and over in my head and I came to the realisation that for some reason, whether it’s the power of suggestion, or the spring-time of year, or the vitamin D the sun was helping me produce amply, maybe even having the full moon pass, or hormones settling down – it doesn’t matter, does it? Right now, for whatever reason, I do feel like a new dawn is coming, and I do feel like I’ve found some more energy and gusto to not only improve old things about me but also try out some new ones. Create new habits, sift through old ones that I used to be better at, improving skills, figuring out what self-care looks like to me right now. I do feel like something’s changing, something’s getting better, some force of nature is making its way through to tell me I’m not alone, and there’s light at the end of whatever tunnel we are stuck in right now.
I know that about a week, or ten days, or a month ago (at this point of the lock-down, I have no clue when I said, wrote or thought XYZ, I just have one string of memories, no days or dates, and I’m ok with that), I wrote about this idea of using the pandemic to improve yourself or gain a new skill, and how unnecessary it was. And I will repeat one thing clearly: if you don’t feel like it, don’t get pressured into that mindset either. It doesn’t work like a miracle cure, and just like all clothing items that claim exactly that: one size does not fit all. If you feel some weird energy that makes you get new hope, ride that wave for all its worth. If you don’t feel it, don’t feel like you have to conjure it up. If everyone had the same solutions work for them, with the same approach, basic issues, and identical expression of the underlying causes for the problem, we’d neither need doctors nor mental health professionals, nor competitive sports or museums filled with different artists. We’re not all the same, and it’s that diversity that makes life interesting. So if this feeling isn’t hitting you right now, and if the cloudy sky of today is hitting you in a very different way, don’t feel bad. These are dramatic times, and “easy” is a term no one would use to describe this period we’re in right now. So don’t feel like reaching out is “not cool” right now. Just like some days are better and some are worse, some people have it harder and others less hard. Life is dramatic right now, don’t think you aren’t allowed to be, too.
I mean… you’ve made it to the end of this post – have I not been quite dramatic?